The first boy I fell in love with
In my dream last night I was once again wanting to touch the first boy I fell in love with and who fell in love with me.
I had three dreams with him in them last night, and my ache for him was just as real as it was when I sat next to him in class.
When he would stare at me and sing me love songs and be unable to pay attention in math class.
But he and I have this connection that I don’t totally understand, and likely never will.
I can feel his energy inside of me.
When I was going to run into him in the subway I would get this feeling in my gut and then he’d be there.
And it happened again and again.
I still don’t know how it’s possible that I could feel him when I had no idea he was nearby. But then a part of me did know he was nearby, but not consciously.
I find it a bit freaky and wonderful all at once.
The only thing I can know is that our connection was and is still alive. He must be open to me the way I’m open to him or it wouldn’t happen.
I haven’t seen him for many, many years, but somehow we’re still connected to each other. Maybe we always will be.
I’d love to see him again. I have no idea if I ever will, but it would be magical for me.
And I believe in magic! (Aren’t these lyrics from a song?)