My heart gets braver as I heal the broken pieces: Gratefulness project day 10
I am learning patience and focus. I am learning what I really want.
I tend to jump right into things, but that isn’t necessarily good for my heart.
I get enthused and excited, and then my heart says, “Whoa! Go more slowly, child!” and then I’m overwhelmed. What I’ve undertaken sometimes my heart has trouble catching up with.
I know enthusiasm and excitement are good things to have, but they need to be in cahoots with my heart. This I have learned in a rather painful way.
And my heart wants me to learn how to communicate. To have the courage to believe I’m worth loving. And to have the courage to express who I really am.
That’s not saying that I’ve been ungenuine before, but I have jumped ahead of what my heart could handle. She’s very brave, my beautiful heart, but she’s been very broken too.
I am seeing that the both go together. My heart gets braver as I heal the broken pieces.
It’s so hard to know who we are deep within. There are some things I know about myself with assurance. But when I’m faced with love and anger and frustration, and I say things I regret or do things that don’t seem like me, I can lose my way.
I don’t like that feeling. I have felt very vulnerable in the past.
I am realizing that vulnerability is all part of being in relationships.
We can’t make everyone happy all the time, nor should we want to.
So we need to know what makes us happy and what we want in our lives.
And also how to communicate that to other people. That is something I need to work on.
And I am, and I will.
Today I’m grateful for being able to ask for what I want. It made me feel very vulnerable and sorry for some things I’ve done. But it also made me realize that I’ve really grown. In the past, I would’ve let it go and not asked for what I wanted. And I would’ve gone on likely to make the same mistakes I’ve made before.
I don’t want to do that anymore.
My broken pieces are healing, and I am learning to trust my heart more and more.
I won’t miss anything, nor do I have to move more quickly than I can handle, to end up getting what I really want and need.
From the series, Because I’m a woman and because I can! by Jacqueline Snider, writer and editor